A fetish for transformation… or a simple case of correction?

All sexual fantasies begin with a leap of the imagination; a leap that involves transporting oneself to another place – the setting of the fantasy.

Imagine a woman with a really sexy boss, for example; every time she fantasises about her boss she transports herself to the context. She may fantasise about being called to his office and him locking the door… or being at a conference and he invites her to his room, or one hundred and one places which then give rise to the actual sex.

This is exactly the same in transgender sexuality… with one slight difference… there is a double leap: both to a place and a body. In transgender sexuality – pre transition – the individual is trapped in the wrong body and thus must be transported to the correct body for the fantasy to work.

To appreciate this… I would ask a woman to imagine the same fantasy as before… perfect man, perfect setting, perfect everything… but when you have sex with him… you’ll have a man’s body and a penis. You’d be like… ‘ew’… and the fantasy would be ruined. This is exactly the same for a transwoman born with a male body. If she has to have a penis and a male body then the fantasy becomes one of having gay sex… which is not going to turn her  on.

Without wanting to state the blindingly, ridiculous obvious… most women do not need to transform to a female body in their fantasy… because they already have one. This is not the case for a transwoman.

So it’s not a fetish for transformation… but a simple case of correction.

Simply being or a case of freeing

Crossdreamers, according to the fetishists, are not transgender… because they get turned on simply by the idea of ‘being a woman’.

The above statement is based on one of those thoughtless comparisons between female sexuality and trans-female sexuality. It can basically be boiled down to… ‘cis women don’t get turned on by the thought of being a woman and having a vagina and breasts… so if a crossdreamer gets turned on by the thought of having a vagina and breasts… he’s a fetishist.’  

Unfortunately, we will have to enter, once more, the world of the glaringly obvious. Women don’t get turned on by the idea of having breasts and a vagina, Because.. THEY’VE ALREADY GOT THEM!

Women who already have breasts and a vagina are already in the zone.

But anyway, this is by the by, the idea that crossdreamers get turned on simply by being a woman, is a misrepresentation. Crossdreamers get turned on at the idea of being a woman as the  logical starting point for a fantasy.

Imagine a woman is about to have sex with a man she has desired for a long time. She is dressing in expensive, sensual lingerie… preparing to enter the bedroom. When she looks in the mirror… her lingerie will heighten the erotic anticipation. This is not because she has a fetish for lingerie, but it causes a flow of hormones that signal an inbound erotic experience. It is like Pavlov’s bell, and it’s the same in transgender sexuality except the trigger is arriving in a body where their true gender lies.

To understand better, imagine a crossdreamer lying in bed. The crossdreamer imagines… their body. Because there isn’t a real female body it’s necessary to transport to one… and because this is a fantasy and not a gritty realist drama, it’s almost certainly in perfect shape with beautiful breasts. At this point there might be a moment – depending on the fantasy – where the subject views this sexy body and it is pleasurable, because this is an erotic trigger. And then the fantasy begins, and participants will appear. Of course!!! How sustainable is the satisfaction of an erotic trigger? We all find it sexy to be sexy… but then you gotta place that sexy in a context for the fantasy to continue. Erotic triggers are fleeting, transitory… if our lingerie clad woman above opens the door and there’s a note from her lover – “had to go… emergency” she’s not going to be able to look in the mirror and recapture the erotic moment. It was a trigger, only exciting as the first step in a sequence… but containing little satisfaction in of itself. This is exactly the same for the opening of a transgender fantasy in which the subject caresses their body.

A woman is in constant touch with her body and the sensuality that derives from it. A transgender woman who has not transitioned has absolutely nothing to grab onto whatsoever, other than her passion within. As a consequence, it’s logical there are moments which will be sensual to her that are not as sensual for a cis woman. When we fantasise, we are suddenly freed from a body that feels alien… to one (albeit imagined) where we channel our female sensuality. For you this may seem like some fetish for being a woman… for us, it is a moment of freeing.

8. Transgender or transvestite?

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