ADMIN: Can Cognitive Therapy Cure Autogynephilia?
Many people searching for a cure for autogynephilia are really looking for a way to understand and manage it—to change how they relate to their desires, rather than being controlled by them.
In this article, Felix Conrad applies the transformative principles of cognitive therapy, particularly Rational Emotive Therapy (RET), to facilitate this understanding and management imperative. Instead of seeing AGP as a burden, a shameful secret, or a source of inner conflict, the goal is to reframe it as an advantage—something you can integrate into your identity with clarity and confidence.
This is the core mission of cognitive therapy: to transform the way you understand something about yourself or the world so that, in turn, your emotions and actions change as well. If AGP has ever felt like a source of weakness, isolation, or confusion, this approach can help you see it differently—perhaps even as a strength.
And with that in mind, let’s get into Conrad’s three reasons why real men are autogynephiliacs.
Introduction: The Incurably Toxic Narrative Around Autogynephilia
Imagine that autogynephilia was a person, and you were that person. You would be a very disturbed individual indeed. Nobody wants you, everybody hates you, someone somewhere is arguing that you don’t even exist, and the only time people engage with you is to either criticize you, masturbate over you, or find a way to get rid of you.
All this negativity and lack of community is reflected in the people who have gathered around autogynephilia—whether we’re talking about sexologists, academics, social justice warriors, trans activists, or conservative firebrands. I have never encountered such a bunch of miserable bastards in my entire life.
I mean, no wonder there’s never been a serious medical or academic conference about autogynephilia—it would be the worst weekend in a soulless hotel convention hall in Albuquerque, New Mexico, you ever had. The days would be spent sipping watered-down conference coffee, and the evenings with the most dour, sour-faced drinking companions you’ve ever met in your life. And more to the point, who would you fuck? There’d be no conference naughtiness because everyone is either a conservative prude who hates you, a Doc Marten-wearing activist who hates everybody, or a bunch of autogynephiliacs who only love themselves.
So, my friends, do you know what I’m going to do? This week on the podcast, I’m going to tell you something you’ve probably never heard before.
Autogynephilia is cool. Autogynephilia is fun.
And you know what, you downcast, chronically depressed, tortured collection of ingrates? I’m going to hit you with something even more in-your-face:
Real men are crossdreamers.
And here are three reasons why.
1. Crossdreamers Are Better Lovers
A lot of straight guys approach women’s pleasure like an escape room—random trial and error until something works, or they have to be taught by women what to do. But crossdreamers? They have a subconscious, instinctive understanding of female erogenous zones because their brain has mapped those sensations onto themselves.
The psychiatric textbooks of old would have called it anatomical-autogynephilia, but I call it anatomical sympathy. Crossdreamers grow up with phantom female body parts, and although it’s difficult to explain scientifically, crossdreamers just understand how those body parts need to be touched, to what degree, and at what point. It’s a sensitivity that the average straight guy simply doesn’t develop.
2. Crossdreamers Are Women’s Most Devoted Allies—And Not Out of Liberal Guilt
Your average dude doesn’t exactly prioritize or particularly care about women’s issues. The educated male will read the right books, say the right things, and resolve to be a decent, respectful ally. But a crossdreamer? He doesn’t have to force it. His devotion to women is instinctive, automatic, and substantial.
Crossdreamers don’t just admire women—they worship them. And admittedly, that can be a bit creepy. But the longer they live with this fixation, the more they come to a single conclusion: men are the virus, and the cure is women.
It’s why they’re far more likely than other men to vote for women, promote women in the workplace, actually listen to women, and advocate for them. And this isn’t out of obligation, but because they genuinely believe the world would be better if women were completely co-equal in its leadership.
And why does being an ally of women make you manly? Well, it’s very simple. If you believe in an inclusive society—not out of some hackneyed political correctness, but because inclusive societies are inherently more innovative, prosperous, and fair—then it is of vital importance that you support all members of that society. Especially those who make up 50% of it and bring the next generation of humans to life.
If it is a manly aspiration to create a healthy, prosperous, and efficient society, then the crossdreamer’s support of women puts them head and shoulders above their male peers.
3. Crossdreamers Embody Strength, Sacrifice, and Resilience
Putting aside gender theory for a moment—let’s assume there is such a thing as manliness. If we strip it down to its essence, I think we’d all agree that it’s about strength, sacrifice, and resilience. It’s about enduring suffering, taking life’s punches, and carrying on despite the weight.
By that definition, the crossdreamer scores high. You see, the crossdreamer is a tragic figure, and nothing is more manly than tragedy. He is burdened with the only sexuality (fetish, orientation, whatever you want to call it) that is fundamentally impossible to realize.
Think about it: If you’re gay, you can get your man. If you’re bi, you can get your man and your woman. Hell, even if you’re into something as extreme as vorophilia, you could, theoretically, get eaten by a lion and fulfill your desire (though, of course, you wouldn’t be around to enjoy it).
But there is no way on this earth (no matter what your surgeon or your local friendly trans vlogger tells you) to make a man into a biological woman. Yes, you can transition, and for some, that helps. But we all know it’s a fix, a hack—a damn good one, maybe, but still a workaround.
The desire itself—the deep, burning wish to be something biologically impossible—never goes away. And to live with that, to survive that contradiction, to find a way to function despite it—that takes a level of resilience that is admirable and noble. If strength is about carrying impossible burdens, the realist crossdreamer is a man of strength.
Conclusion: The Cure That Isn’t
What’s actually going on in this podcast?
Today, I have been arguing that, contrary to popular belief, autogynephilia is actually a manly thing. But at this point, I must confess something: what your old friend, Felix, has actually been doing is subjecting you (in a rather sneaky manner) to cognitive therapy.
Cognitive therapy is much more aggressive and proactive than other forms of therapy because it’s not about droning on and on or listening or expressing your feelings. It’s about challenging those feelings.
This is relevant to you because a tremendously negative and self-defeating narrative has come to dominate all discourse around autogynephilia. And I would argue that this narrative is not just bad for your mental health, but that it’s arbitrary and unnecessary. You have the power to build an alternative narrative—one in which this unusual form of sexuality does not make you weak, disadvantaged, or dysfunctional, but interesting, strong, and sophisticated.
You don’t have to agree with that narrative. But the point is that you don’t have to agree with any narrative at all. You can use reason to construct an entirely new one.
A common internet search with respect to autogynephilia is the search for a cure. Well, guess what?
There is no cure—just like there’s no cure for being a lesbian.
There is only the Zen of management, understanding, and acceptance.
And the best way to reach that state of Zen about your autogynephilia is to build a healthy narrative around it.
That is my recommendation for you, my dear friend. I sincerely believe that if you adopt this approach, in combination with becoming a realist instead of a dag, you will experience a transformation in how you think about your sexuality and how it affects your mental well-being.
However, if you don’t want to take my advice, I ask only one thing:
Stop wallowing in the doom and gloom of all those sexologists, commentators, and activists who talk about autogynephilia.
In other words… stop being so bloody miserable.
Explore the concept of autogynophilia cures with these related articles
Is there a cure for autogynephilia?
Managing autogynophilia in a gender identity crisis
